Author's Diction~Vipin Behari Goyal: Wish You A Happy Break-Up :You Deserve Better

Wednesday, December 31, 2014

Wish You A Happy Break-Up :You Deserve Better

                            Myth of Made for Each Other

break up, heart broke,remedy for break up


In many Tribal Communities and now advance communities Polyamory or Polyfidelitous, where more than two persons consent for Group Marriage depending upon their sexual orientation, would lead to an alternate society. It could be a Line Marriage if both partners agree to invite any third person of either gender to be a part of the family to save their stale marriage life.

Two great Indian Epics Ramayana and Mahabharata have many examples of such group marriages. In Ramayana Bali and Sugriva who were twin tribal brothers had Tara as their wife, father of Rama had three wives and in Mahabharata Five brothers had one wife and Krishna had innumerable wives.

Materialism has made human egocentric and possessive. He has become bundles of the negative qualities of other animals. Made for each other is a myth which suits aristocratic apologists who were anti feminist and were always scared of powerful women. In other words, the authority of church or any religious institution to provide a certificate of approval and declare loving couple as 'man and wife' till death do them apart, was a conspiracy of the society.

This complementary relationship with ' The other half ' or ' Better half ' is Utopian which is fictional in origin. Art and literature, especially poetry was invented by Man to appease women for ulterior motives. Woman at a point of time acts naive and is flattered to the advantage of man.

From Buddha (Unfathomably deep, deep like a fish course in the water is the character of a woman)  to Freud ('The great question that has never been answered, and which I have not yet been able to answer, despite my thirty years of research into the feminine soul, is "What does a woman want?" - Sigmund Freud: Life and Work)  women were proclaimed to be mysterious, not because they are, but because it helps  promoting chauvinism and gender-superiority.

Acknowledge these Five types of relationship which always exists when Dynamics of any Relationship are explored (explained in detail in the book "Worst is Over")

1. Sustainable Relationship: Are those relationships which 'takes less and gives more'. They lead to enrichment and nourishment of relationship.

2. Love-Hate Relationship: More you love, more likely you would hate. They go together. Some exercises may help you identify the proportion of each in your relationship.

3. Vacuumised Relationship: Why do you prefer to buy vacuumised packs of eatables. They keep the things fresh. That is how a vacuumised relationship always remains fresh.

4. Oedipus-Electra Relationship: Woman searches the quality of her father and Man searches for the qualities of his mother in their  relationship. It leads them to disappointment in each other.

5. Naturalistic Relationship: Relationship would grow only if it is naturalistic and leads to emptiness or quiescence. When the pendulum is going on one side, it is gaining energy to reach on the other side.

Dynamics of Organizational behavior are easy to handle, but the dynamics of the relationship between two individuals has more dimensions than one can imagine.

As it is said  "Better Luck Next Time"

© Vipin Behari Goyal
Excerpts from his Book "The Worst is Over"
Author is also Advocate at Rajasthan High Court, Jodhpur

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